It's only rock 'n' roll (but I like it)
I grew up in a home where I heard four musical artists almost exclusively throughout my formative years. I'm not even remotely kidding about this. Two of them -- horrific freak crooner Barry Manilow and 70s folk siren Carley Simon -- were Mom favorites that I successfully managed to tune out before permanent damage could be done. The other two were the Rolling Stones and the Beatles. You may have heard of them.
There is a popular theory about the latter two super groups that I happen to put a lot of faith into. It goes something like this: Everyone in the world can be divided into one of two categories. You're either a "Stones Person" -- which amounts to a kind of free-wheeling, outgoing and impulsive extrovert type -- or you're a "Beatles Person" -- a slightly more introspective and thoughtful brand of human, free in mind, body and spirit. Of course, I'm not sure you can divide all people like this -- it's doubtful a suicide bomber on the Gaza Strip is likely to side with either Mick or Macca on matters of the heart -- but it holds true more often than not.
The beauty of this breakdown is that you don't have to be a fan of either group to be part of this study -- although it's a serious red flag to me if you don't like at least some tunes by either band. I mean, c'mon. Not sure what category you fall into? Luckily I have a simple and effective test to determine just that.
Listen to the The Beatles' "Let It Be" -- off the 1970 album of the same name -- and the Stones' "Gimme Shelter" -- off 1969's Let It Bleed. I mean really listen to them. Dissect the lyrics, soak in the melodies, get lost in the atmosphere. Which of these songs grab you first? Which one changes the temperature of the room? When you figure that out, you have your answer.
A closer look at the two songs helps to explain why. The menace in Mick Jagger's voice is palpable in "Gimme Shelter," telling the story of a dark cultural acopolyse that's "just a shot away" with the opposite spectrum of love and peace "just a kiss away." It's a chaotic world teetering on the brink. The lyric and melody cuts a direct correlation into the unpredictable nature of a Stones Person.
"Let It Be," written and sung by Paul McCartney, is a deeply personal gospel-like tune with a theme centering on the loss of a love in your life and how that figure endures as you move on. That's how I hear it anyway. Over a soft piano intro, Macca croons, "When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom ... Let it be." I've never written a song, but just typing that made me jealous. I can only imagine how the lead singer of Hinder feels. Upon closer review, the vulnerable nature of "Let It Be" draws a connection to the dreamy and reflective nature of the Beatles Person.
Personally speaking, I think deep down I always wanted to be a Stones Person at heart, but in the end I became a product of Beatlemania ... with sprinkles of Keith Richards. You can't choose where you end up. It's in your DNA.
Now you may be inclined to ask, "Hey Dan, ye of the shocking social insight, steep intellect, generous looks, and incredibly large hands, can a Beatles/Stones love combo make it in the longterm?"
The answer is ... yes. In fact, the argument can be made that Beatles/Stones combinations make the best partners, as the relationship will be more dynamic and encompassing in scope. The worst all-Beatles pairings can develop into that boring married and/or engaged couple (you know who they are) who watch "The Ghost Whisperer" on Friday nights and attend way more garage sales than common logic should dictate. On the flipside, two Stones people gone bad can be mired in one of those explosive relationships where the couple basically do two things: Fight and fuck. This is entertaining at first to outsiders (hilarious even), but it grows old ... quickly.
That said, it's important to note that all Stones People are not whiskey-guzzling, smack-shooting, mass impregnators and walking semen dumpsters. Nor or all Beatles People stoner hippies, bizarre zealots, and doughy peaceniks. Let's try to keep that in mind.
Chances are, you've dated both Beatles People and Stones People. Think back to your ex's and I'm sure you can divide them right now without much of a problem. Hopefully, a pattern emerges. Your more lasting relationships will likely fall into one category or the other. Remember that in the future as you navigate the Highway of Musical Love (it's Exit 12 off the Hutch).
And with that, I'm going to grab a Gatorade and watch some bad Court TV murder mystery programming. I'll discuss the devasting effects of Barry Manilow's Greatest Hits tomorrow. Until then, let it be.
Yeah, I'm a Beatles guy all the way.
There is a popular theory about the latter two super groups that I happen to put a lot of faith into. It goes something like this: Everyone in the world can be divided into one of two categories. You're either a "Stones Person" -- which amounts to a kind of free-wheeling, outgoing and impulsive extrovert type -- or you're a "Beatles Person" -- a slightly more introspective and thoughtful brand of human, free in mind, body and spirit. Of course, I'm not sure you can divide all people like this -- it's doubtful a suicide bomber on the Gaza Strip is likely to side with either Mick or Macca on matters of the heart -- but it holds true more often than not.
The beauty of this breakdown is that you don't have to be a fan of either group to be part of this study -- although it's a serious red flag to me if you don't like at least some tunes by either band. I mean, c'mon. Not sure what category you fall into? Luckily I have a simple and effective test to determine just that.
Listen to the The Beatles' "Let It Be" -- off the 1970 album of the same name -- and the Stones' "Gimme Shelter" -- off 1969's Let It Bleed. I mean really listen to them. Dissect the lyrics, soak in the melodies, get lost in the atmosphere. Which of these songs grab you first? Which one changes the temperature of the room? When you figure that out, you have your answer.
A closer look at the two songs helps to explain why. The menace in Mick Jagger's voice is palpable in "Gimme Shelter," telling the story of a dark cultural acopolyse that's "just a shot away" with the opposite spectrum of love and peace "just a kiss away." It's a chaotic world teetering on the brink. The lyric and melody cuts a direct correlation into the unpredictable nature of a Stones Person.
"Let It Be," written and sung by Paul McCartney, is a deeply personal gospel-like tune with a theme centering on the loss of a love in your life and how that figure endures as you move on. That's how I hear it anyway. Over a soft piano intro, Macca croons, "When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom ... Let it be." I've never written a song, but just typing that made me jealous. I can only imagine how the lead singer of Hinder feels. Upon closer review, the vulnerable nature of "Let It Be" draws a connection to the dreamy and reflective nature of the Beatles Person.
Personally speaking, I think deep down I always wanted to be a Stones Person at heart, but in the end I became a product of Beatlemania ... with sprinkles of Keith Richards. You can't choose where you end up. It's in your DNA.
Now you may be inclined to ask, "Hey Dan, ye of the shocking social insight, steep intellect, generous looks, and incredibly large hands, can a Beatles/Stones love combo make it in the longterm?"
The answer is ... yes. In fact, the argument can be made that Beatles/Stones combinations make the best partners, as the relationship will be more dynamic and encompassing in scope. The worst all-Beatles pairings can develop into that boring married and/or engaged couple (you know who they are) who watch "The Ghost Whisperer" on Friday nights and attend way more garage sales than common logic should dictate. On the flipside, two Stones people gone bad can be mired in one of those explosive relationships where the couple basically do two things: Fight and fuck. This is entertaining at first to outsiders (hilarious even), but it grows old ... quickly.
That said, it's important to note that all Stones People are not whiskey-guzzling, smack-shooting, mass impregnators and walking semen dumpsters. Nor or all Beatles People stoner hippies, bizarre zealots, and doughy peaceniks. Let's try to keep that in mind.
Chances are, you've dated both Beatles People and Stones People. Think back to your ex's and I'm sure you can divide them right now without much of a problem. Hopefully, a pattern emerges. Your more lasting relationships will likely fall into one category or the other. Remember that in the future as you navigate the Highway of Musical Love (it's Exit 12 off the Hutch).
And with that, I'm going to grab a Gatorade and watch some bad Court TV murder mystery programming. I'll discuss the devasting effects of Barry Manilow's Greatest Hits tomorrow. Until then, let it be.
Yeah, I'm a Beatles guy all the way.
posted by Dan Hanzus at 9:19 PM
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